Why Telling People to "Accept Reality" Can Be Deeply Problematic and Oppressive Phrasing

If this work is helpful, please consider donating or hiring me for consulting work (see more below) 

* * *

A problem is the word "accept", which quite literally (by definition) has at least two very different meanings.

A) One is more about "consent to receive"

B) One is more about "understand to exist"

The spirit of what you're writing about is B. But, even by the unclear label alone, it hints at pressuring abuse survivors into A - that they "consent" to having been abused. That they "accept" the abuse, meaning saying it was okay that it happened.

The semantic are unclear, and it's horrifically irresponsible communication to not come up with clearer language.

Rather than be held accountable for clearer language, almost EVERY SINGLE professional I've talked to (in the hundreds at this point) insists that it's a problem of the listener and reader for "hearing the meaning" wrong.

Throw out radical acceptance as a term. We deserve better, less hostile and potentially damaging language.

* * *

This article brought to you by the currently unfunded Peer Voices Network. 

Please consider donating to support this work. I am disabled, financially struggling, and am forced by existing social structures into producing content like this for free. I hope those with means and privilege will eventually shift priorities toward increased support for lived experience content generation and expertise sharing. Donations are never required and always appreciated. 

Donate Link: https://ko-fi.com/socialrealitylab

I am also available for consultation work, curriculum development, trainings, etc.. I enjoy partnering with organizations on development of more accurate understandings of social reality. 

Find us on YouTube at: https://www.youtube.com/@peervoicesnetwork

I can be reached by email at peervoicesnetwork@gmail.com

* * *